What God Wants: Reflective Questions for Christmas

by Joe Leavell

The Inkblot Test We All Take

One of the most well-known psychological assessments is the Rorschach Test, developed by psychiatrist Hermann Rorschach in the 1920s. It uses vague and ambiguous shaped inkblots to assess a person’s personality based on what they see.

As a biblical counselor, I use a kind of inkblot test as well, though mine is far simpler and far more revealing.

It consists of just two questions, yet it tells me a great deal about how someone sees the world:

• How they view themselves

• Whether they believe they have value

• How they understand the Gospel

• Whether they define themselves by performance, usefulness, or self-interest

• Whether they are people-pleasers or genuinely self-aware and honest

Question #1: What Does God Want?

Fill in the blank:

God wants ___________.

Don’t rush.
Don’t answer with what you think you should say.
Take a moment and answer honestly.

I often hear a wide variety of responses.

Some answers focus on doing:

God wants me to:

• Tell others about Jesus

• Go to church

• Read the Bible

• Serve my spouse and love my kids

Others are more self-focused:

God wants me to:

• Be happy

• Be successful

• Be free from these problems

Some respond with a vague, theological generalization:

God wants us to:

• Love Him

• Obey Him

• Serve Him

Are these answers inherently wrong?
Not necessarily, depending on what is meant by them.

But they often reveal when someone is missing a foundational truth.

Why Did Jesus Come?

Why do we celebrate Christmas at all?
Why did Jesus come in the first place?

We often hear the answer:

“He came to redeem us from our sin!”

Yes! But why?

“So we can go to heaven and be with Him!”

True! But what does that actually mean?

Here is the simple, glorious truth:

God wants…me.

Say it out loud.

God wants ME.

Not just us.
Not something from us.
Not even merely something for us.

God wants me.

I’d like you to read that out loud three times, each time emphasizing a different word: 

GOD wants me! 

God WANTS me! 

God wants ME!

Think through what that means. Jesus, the Son of God, was born of a virgin, lived a sinless life, went to the cross, died, and rose again because God wants me.

Why Should I Care What God Wants?

Many who come to counseling wrestle with this very question.

Like Adam, their deepest issue is not merely behavioral or circumstantial—it is that they either:

• Do not understand the depth of God’s love for them, or

• Struggle to care or understand why it matters

Adam once walked with God in the cool of the garden, enjoying intimate friendship. But he chose to turn away, seeking his own tiny kingdom instead of trusting God’s desire for him.

That rebellion shattered humanity’s relationship with God.

Sin could have been the end of the story.

But because of His love, God wanted us back.

So on Christmas night, God sent His Son, born as a baby, laid in a feeding trough, to begin to bring about the redemption of what He truly wanted: you.

If that truth does not give you pause, it tells me something important about where biblical counseling must begin.

Wanted or Useful?

Some people struggle deeply to believe that God would actually want them. They’ve wrongly learned, often since childhood, that they are only really wanted when they are useful or obedient and subservient to other people’s wants. These strive endlessly to gain other people’s approval because they believe this is how love works.

But Jesus didn’t come for your performance. He came for you!

Others understand the implication of God wanting them all too well:

“If God really wants me, then I’ll have to care about what He wants.”

And that feels threatening to their own wants. They rightly understand that their wants do not align with His and so they run and hide as fast as they can from His presence. But if Christmas reminds us of anything, it is that God is persistent in His love.

This leads naturally to the second question.

Question #2: What Do You Want in Return?

In response to what God wants, fill in the blank:

I want ___________.

Once again, people-pleasers jump to the expected answer:

“I want God.”

But do you really? Is knowing and loving God truly the center of your life’s desires?
What does that mean to you? Tell me more. 

Some answer more cautiously:

“I want to want God.”

Others are painfully honest:

• “I just want a spouse who loves me for me.”

• “I want peace from this weight of depression.”

• “I’m tired of losing. When do I get a turn at winning?”

These answers matter. They reveal the deep pain of the heart, and they show where the Gospel must meet real life.

Reordering Our Desires

Our desires have been complicated by sin, but God’s original design remains clear.

The Westminster Shorter Catechism puts it beautifully:

“What is the chief end of man? To glorify God and enjoy Him forever.”

John Piper sharpens it further:

“The chief end of man is to glorify God by enjoying Him forever. God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him.”

God enjoys what He made.
He loves you.
He wants YOU.
He is glorified when we want Him in return.

Even before you ever thought of wanting Him, Christ came, died, and rose again so that intimate friendship with God could be restored.

But What About Real Life?

“But what does that matter when my marriage is falling apart?”
“Why should I care that God wants me when my father never noticed me?”
“Why does this matter when I just need my kids to listen?”

I’m glad you asked.

God’s desire for us is foundational. Without it, life collapses into despair. When we seek meaning apart from God’s love, we settle for lesser things that cannot carry the weight of our deepest longings.

When children are driven to meet their parents’ desires rather than resting in God’s love, they either strive relentlessly or rebel completely.

When a spouse is placed on the throne of the heart, the pressure crushes love and inevitably breeds bitterness and despair.

The Beauty of Christmas

Without Jesus’ birth, we would never truly know whether God wants us. Frankly, it wouldn’t really matter if He said He did, because He would have left us to our own destruction without rescue or hope. 

But God did act.

Christmas reminds us that we are so deeply wanted and loved by the Creator of the universe that He was willing to enter suffering so that we could walk with Him in eternal friendship.

As Scripture says:

“We love because He first loved us.” (1 John 4:19)

When we understand God’s love for us, our desires begin to change. The more I understand His love for me, the more I can’t help but love Him back. The more I love Him, all of my loves fall into place. 

C.S. Lewis summarizes it perfectly:

“When first things are put first, second things are not suppressed but increased.”

So… What About You?

This simple question unlocks so much.

This Christmas:

• What do you think God wants?

• What do you want in return?

Your answers may tell you more than you realize.

From all of us at Biblical Counseling of Arizona, we wish you a very Merry Christmas!!

You aren’t meant to walk alone. If you would like to pursue counseling through BCA or have additional questions, please reach out today! You can register here or contact us at info@biblicalcounselingaz.org.

Biblical Counseling of Arizona is a 501 C3 non-profit counseling center that relies on the generosity of donors to provide affordable care for those in financial need. If you are interested in asking specific questions about our counseling or are interested in financially partnering with BCA, please reach out to us at (480) 406-1791, write us at info@biblicalcounselingaz.org, or click here to donate.